Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Martial Arts Mayhem: Master Slices Throat

WARNING: In this video, a "Master" slices his own students throat with a sword.

Today in jujutsu class, my sensei was basically throwing me to the ground over his shoulder by applying pressure to my elbow joint. I let him do it to me; he let me do it to him. This requires a degree of trust.

What you will see in the video I have posted above, is a fine example of student/teacher trust. Unfortunately, it is also a fine example of student/teacher idiocy.

The "Master" in this video displays idiocy in being sucked into doing something he is obviously not ready to do, at the risk of incredible injury (to others that is!).

Not only has my own mother showed more finesse with a blade in the kitchen, but the jerk of a sensei didn't even demonstrate the most basic maybe the most important skill of a martial artist: AWARENESS!!!

The first thing he should have been aware of, is that he was not capable to pull of the stunt he was working on. Secondly, Even after slicing his student's throat, he just non-nonchalantly potters off as if nothing happened. Like an ostrich burying its head in the ground, he ignores all the signs. I imagine that his ego was so wounded that he couldn't bear to face the mistake he had just made. That being said, I do not put all the blame on him, after all, the student really should know better.

I mean seriously, if my sensei asked me if he could cut a cucumber in half off of my throat with a katana, I'd think it was some kind of test...A TEST to see how STUPID I was!!!

That's right, a deadly Darwinian test to weed out the denser students.

I wonder if such tests existed in medieval Japan...hmmm...I can picture it now...

Young graduating ninja being told by their Master "You have done well, but one test remains: To be a true ninja, one must survive the drinking of the auspicious-ninja-dragon-acid-blood-of-death!!!".

While half the ninja scale up the wall to escape the test, the Master oversees that those who wish to be "true ninja" drink a hearty helping of acid.

The Master, having wiped out the last of the remaining dumb-asses from his guild, and can rest in peace knowing that his true disciples were smart enough to scale the wall and go onto live long lives of assassination and espionage.

Well, I don't know if such tests existed then, but from this video, I assume they exist now! I hope I will never be tested in such a way, but if I am, I certainly hope that I will be smart enough to recognize it!

Or at the very least drunk enough to not care!

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